The baby diaries

First Comes Love…

baby

Our little dude at 19 weeks 1 day

Then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage. Although not quite in that particular order for us. If you weren’t aware I’m Pregnant. At this very point in time I’m 21 weeks 4 days (according to my app, that also tells me I only have 18 weeks 3 days to go ahhh) and I’m not going to lie this is my second attempt at writing this post.

I’m going to try and keep it short and sweet, which can be difficult for me, so I apologise in advance. And if anything I wanted to blog about this so I could look back at this really special time and have some sort of log and  also if someone is going through a similar experience they might find some comfort in finding this.

When I pictured myself in pregnancy I always imagined I would sneeze and get pregnant. Its funny because you go so long trying not to get pregnant and then when you decide you are in a stable, loving relationship and you’re both ready its not so easy (well it wasn’t for us).

I actually got pregnant in our first month of trying. I was feeling a little under the weather and then missed my period, low and behold I was pregnant. ‘Man that was easy’ I thought to myself. We got excited and told my mum and started dreaming and making plans for the poppy seed sized foetus we thought was growing inside of me. Sadly however about 6 and a half weeks along, I woke up in the night with a popping sensation and a lot of blood. Sadly I had a very early miscarriage, or what I believe is called a chemical pregnancy, which is where in basic layman’s terms; your body thinks you are pregnant but either the pregnancy doesn’t attach properly or there’s a chromosome issue. We grieved for this loss and it felt like a real defeat, the one thing I believed my body was built for and it couldn’t do it. Not many people talk about these early miscarriages, but they are a loss no matter how early and it still hurts. But after many tears and the support of my partner we got through it.

It took us another 7 months of trying before we finally conceived again. Which felt like a life time, every time my monthly visitor came, it felt like another punch in the gut. However I started to feel really weird, stomach cramps and a fever. I was convinced I was coming down with the flu. I didn’t want to get ahead of myself. But after feeling really rough for two weeks, I then suddenly noticed my period was two weeks late. I took a test an low and behold it came back positive. And not just faintly positive like before, those two lines appeared pretty much as soon as I peed on the stick.

I waited until I was 10 weeks pregnant until I went to the GP. Part of this was due to the fact that this was happening right over the christmas period and the other reason was that I was scared and part of me felt like if I acknowledged it, it would come back and bite me in the butt. Anyway I had my first of many blood tests done and found myself a great midwife and entered into this whole overwhelming world of pregnancy.

As well as believing that I would get pregnant in no time, I also naively believed that pregnancy would be a breeze. A time where I could eat whatever I wanted, not have to exercise and I would just have this natural glow from within. Oh how I was wrong. I am so jealous if this was you. To be fair I haven’t had the easiest pregnancy but by no means has it been really complicated (knock on wood). But to start with was the chronic tiredness. I just couldn’t stay awake, that combined with the all day nausea, I felt like I was constantly hungover. Another side effect was the need to pee all the time, I was getting up around 3-4 times a night.

At 13 weeks came some other complications, bleeding. Being pregnant, one of the perks, I thought was not having to deal with periods or bleeding. Oh how wrong was I AGAIN. Now I’ve been told on many occasions, that bleeding can be common in early pregnancy. But with any bleeding I would always get in touch with your GP or midwife. As I said I had my first bout of bleeding at 13 weeks, after having a pretty perfect 12 week scan. I of course freaked out, my midwife was great and was referred for an emergency scan; where I was told baby was fine and healthy and that it might just be a bit of excess fluid that had been pushed out. I tried to put it to the back of my mind and was a huge relief knowing that baby was on track.

Then at 16 weeks I bleed again, this time I had cramping and quite substantial bleeding. I was at work and again panicked. My midwife had me come and see her and she managed to find a strong heartbeat right away. HUGE relief, however she wanted me to go for another scan. In I went again, and again I was told baby was really healthy and they couldn’t see any reason for the bleed. I then to my dismay bleed again the next day, and being a little fed up rang my midwife, who again was awesome. She the referred me to an obstetrician and for another scan. This scan was a little different this time (probably because I was becoming a regular), they checked my cervix which was thankfully closed but they also saw that the placenta was closer than it should be to my cervix and this possibly could be what was causing the bleeding. From then on work were amazing and stood me down from my day job and pretty much put on bedrest, in the hopes that the placenta would move out of the way.

Now here I am 21 weeks along. We had our 19 week scan; where not only did we find out we are expecting a little boy, but also that the placenta had moved to the front of my stomach and away from my cervix. Which was what I was hoping for. Although I have been warned that the placing of my placenta at the front of the stomach can still cause some bleeding. I have been given the all clear to head back to work.

So here I am, just at the beginning and what a story it’s been so far. I know that many go through much more complicated pregnancies than this and I am so grateful to have a baby that is doing well.

I’m learning so much more everyday. Some helpful, some not so much (thanks Dr Google). Pregnancy is a whole new world that I don’t know if I was fully prepared for. All the lingo, classes, what to eat and what not to eat, what to wear, can get a girl all in a tizz. What I’ve found really helpful is joining a Facebook page of other mothers in New Zealand due in the same month. It’s been great, even though I don’t tend to say much just reading the support and love these Mums have for one another is really reassuring. There always seems to be someone with a calming word when panic sets in for someone else.

Anyway I think I’ll leave it there,  If you’ve made it this far I applaud you. I’ve blabbed on much longer than I wanted and this probably isn’t that interesting to many, but it feels cathartic to share all this.

I’ve decided with this free time to try my very best to get this blog back up and running and I promise my next post will be beauty related. I have lots of D.I.Y projects coming up too and of course a wedding to plan. Which I’m wanting to also blog about .

Well thanks for reading,

Bailey xox

 

 

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Relationships

How Can You Mend A Broken Heart?

Ok, so I know I haven’t posted for a lightyear and I really do apologise. I don’t really have any excuse other than LIFE. We’ve bought a house and have been settling and nesting for the past year and it has been Amazing with a capital A. Which brings me on to the title of this post. I’ve been doing a bit of reflecting recently (maybe it’s the nesting?), and I am by no means saying my life is perfect, it ebbs and flows like life should. But I think this could be the happiest I have felt in a long time. If I were to tell myself this 3 and a half years ago when I was at my lowest point I honestly wouldn’t have believed it. The person that, at the time I thought was my be all and end all had just told me they didn’t love me anymore. These are no words any person madly in love ever wants to hear and I wouldn’t wish that pain upon anyone. I know that when it initially happened to me I was googling and youtubing trying to find some advice on how to deal with my broken heart. So I thought I would share with you my version of how to mend a broken heart. This is where I get all Dr Phil on your ass, so you might want to grab a cuppa, this is a long one!

1.Cry Your Heart Out

This may seem like I am stating the obvious here, but one of the best things to do is just get it all out. I cried for 3 days straight. My Mum would just look at me and I’d cry. After those 3 days of crying I felt like I was done. There’s no shame in crying, after all you’re grieving. You’ve lost something that was out of your control. You didn’t have a choice in this and thats worth a big old cry. I find too that, if I do a lot of crying in the beginning it makes it easier when telling people as I’ve shed all those tears.

2.Family and Friends

This is when you need those support networks the most, which again might sound obvious. My mum actually slept in my bed with me that first night, as I didn’t want to be alone. You might feel like you want to be alone but there is comfort in knowing the people that love you ‘worts and all’ are by your side. They’ll be hurting for you too. People on team ‘YOU’ are what you need. They’re there with open arms, bottles of wine and chocolate. Utilise them (and the wine), I found that the advice and wisdom my family and my friends shared were what got me through. And usually that’s when the truth comes out that they really didn’t like your partner and they couldn’t tell you until now. So have a good old bitch session; about how bad their choice of shoes were or how they looked like they belonged in Harry Potter. It’ll make you feel better for a moment and remember the people who love you the most won’t judge you.

3. Delete, Delete, Delete

Their phone number, email address, friends numbers, parents number,work number, defriend them on facebook. I think you get the gist. I even went to the dramatic lengths of deleting my own facebook, to quote my very wise brother “anyone that actually cares about you knows how to get in touch with you without facebook”. And you know what he was right (don’t tell him). Deleting everything also means that even though the temptation to send those 1am texts,emails,voicemails declaring how much you miss them is still there; the ease of having their number on speed dial is gone. And yes some of you might know his/her number by heart, you’re going to have to use all that strength inside of you to not contact them. Trust me you’ll only regret it later. Also what helped for me was to delete all photo’s, emails and messages. And put anything sentimental like cards and gifts in a box and then deal with it when you are felling better, out of sight out of mind. Getting rid of everything is not only great for therapy but you’ll only go back and look at these things when you’re feeling a little down and that’s not going to help anyone.

4. No Contact Zone

Similar to the above point but much harder I think. One of my biggest pieces of advice would be DO NOT CONTACT THEM. Even if its to say you’ve seen their mum at the supermarket or if its just to tell them that you hate the heck out of them. Don’t do it. How do I know not to? Because I did and looking back it just made the healing time longer and things much harder. There are still feelings there, love or not, feelings linger. It’s hard to go from having that person be yours to them being a stranger. Lines get blurred and crossed and next thing you know you’re kissing and then they remember they broke up with you for a reason and you get hurt all over again (true story). It’s much better for both parties to just move on and have some distance. Maybe in a year if you see them a polite “hello, how are ya?” would suffice.

5. Don’t Be Too Hard On Yourself

This is the easiest time to get all Debbie Downer and that is fair enough. You’ve just had you’re heart ripped out of your chest. When you are on the receiving end of a breakup its does feel like your flaws are being highlighted. You feel like you’ve failed, like you’re not good enough and no one will ever love you the way they did. That’s fine, you can wallow in that for a bit, but after a few hours, even a day of a self pity party, that really gets you nowhere and no one wants to hang out with Debbie Downer. Instead acknowledge your part in the breakup, what you could’ve done different, things you might not be so proud of. And on the flip side; acknowledge the things that you are proud of about yourself and the relationship, what you did do well and the love you shared. Remember this is just one persons view of you and it shouldn’t define who you think you are; only you can do that.

6. Set Some Goals

What better time to start again and set yourself some new targets than after a breakup. This may feel like the end but believe me its not. For me, it ended up being a little dramatic and I moved to the other side of the world but that meant I started a new job, I finally passed my driving test and I lived away from the family home. Some of the decisions I made in that learning period, I’m not so proud of. But I’d honestly not do anything differently, it has made me who I am today. So if it’s to join the gym, start you’re own candle making business, go travelling, run a marathon, join tinder; now is the best time to tick those boxes and start feeling good about yourself. There’s no better feeling than bettering yourself and gaining some independence, there also isn’t a sweeter revenge, than showing someone you are a success.

7. Hit The Shops

Or the salon or the gym, Just pamper yourself. Do something that gives you that hit of instant gratification and joy. Trying a new hairstyle or adding new pieces to your wardrobe, will help reflect a new you on the outside at least. As material and superficial these things are I truly believe this can help. My birthday wasn’t long after the split, so my parents treated me to a facial and some new clothes. It was incredible, to look in the mirror and even though on the inside I might not be feeling my best the outside was looking pretty darn good, if I do say so myself. So go and hit the shops, what better excuse to get that credit card out than a bit of self loving retail therapy.

8. Have A Girls/Boys Night

Don’t let those new additions to your wardrobe and hairdo go to waste. Get your besties over, get the wines in, put on your favourite jams, and get glammed up. Whether you end up just having a night at home or you head out on the tiles (as my uncle would say), having a night with your girls or boys around you, being a dork, having a dance and a flirt, is just what the doctor ordered. And lets be honest having a few bevvys never hurt (in moderation haha).

9.Write A Letter

For me I struggle to verbalise my feelings. So I need to write it down. The best thing I did was write a letter to my ex. The worst thing I did was actually send it to him. I’ve made that mistake a couple times in my life and I don’t plan on repeating it. So in saying this write that letter, get how you’re feeling out, tell them how much you’re hurting and that you miss them and you hate them for doing this to you. Once you’ve got all those feelings down read it and then leave it. I used to look back on this when I was unsure or feeling low and it would remind me that I’ve felt worse and things have been worse. When you’re ready throw that letter out, it’s the past and if you keep hold of it, it’ll be a reminder of how you once felt. Leave those feelings with the letter in the bin.

10.Time

This is the most annoying tip, but probably the one with the most truth. Time really does heal all wounds. What I really want to highlight with time is that it won’t happen overnight, which is probably not what you want to hear.There’s no quick fix and it probably took me a full year to finally feel better and that was a year of a lot of achievements and probably one of the best years I’ve ever had. But I’m going to be honest; in that year there were days where I was still hurting and the pain would get to me and I would find myself having a little cry, when I would hear a song that would remind me of him or when I found out he’d moved on. These days; when I think about him or someone asks about my past I feel nothing but peaceful. It’s like watching a movie about two people that I vaguely know. So I’m sorry to say this but you’ll have to wait this one out.

I had written a huge paragraph about how I’d moved on and that I’ve now found the one, the man I share a house with, hope to marry and have kids with. But lets be honest not many people want to read that when the thought of being with another person seems so remote and you’ve just had something really sucky happen to you. Not to void all the amazing things my current partner has done for me and helped me to heal my heart, I just don’t want it to seem like the only way through is to love someone new, though it helps, its not the only solution. Instead I want to ask you to look at this horrible situation as the best thing that could ever happen to you. Yes this is out of your control and you didn’t ask for this, but control what you do next. Be hopeful of what is to come and this is a time where there are a multitude of possibilities. Anyway enough preachy preachy, I’m sorry if this post has just been full of cliches but if any of this can help one person out there than its worth it.

Thanks so much for stopping by and you never know I might just be back in a few days with something a little lighter.

Bailey xox

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Recipe

Chicken, Mushroom and Thyme, Quinoa “Risotto”

After Searching a fair bit on the internet for a healthy version of one of my favourite ever dishes Risotto, I then had this mad idea to replace the rice with Quinoa (yes that really hard to pronounce grain) for a semi guilt free twist on my fave dish. Turns out it’s not such a mad idea and actually there are lots of recipes out there. I found this awesome recipe from Donna Hay, so I can’t take the credit but me being me I decided to use add chicken and see how it came out. If you’ve made risotto before this recipe pretty much follows the same base, but just substituting the rice for quinoa. I’ve since made this dish three different times and it has been so delicious each and every time and it was also way too good not to share.I say this is “Risotto” but risotto gets its name because of the rice used in the dish so this is really a knock off hehe.

I’m not going to rewrite the recipe, as I reckon Donna Hay has it pretty much covered. The only difference in mine is that I added chicken in. I just used chicken thighs about 500-600g. I cooked this through with the garlic, thyme and mushroom. I also substituted the dry white wine with grape juice, only because when I went to the supermarket to buy the ingredients I had forgotten my ID and even though I’m well and truly beyond 18, I do look around 17 especially on this non make up wearing day, so I really couldn’t be bothered with the hassle of explaining that yes I am 26 and yes I know I’m young looking. To be really honest the grape juice worked really well.

I’ve linked the recipe above but I’ll also pop it here

http://www.donnahay.com.au/recipes/dinners/dinners-pasta-rice-noodles/quinoa-mushroom-and-thyme-risotto

Here is however a few pictures of how I made the risotto and the end result. I really hope you all give this a go.

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quinoarisotto

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Thanks for reading,

Stay cool,

Bailey

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Beauty Bites

Nuxe Reve De Miel Lip Balm

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I’m going to try start a series of posts where I do a short review on a product I’m really into at the moment. The first winner of my Beauty Bite award is this Lip Balm By Nuxe. I purchased mine from Feelunique.com, for around $18-$20 NZD including P&P. After reading and hearing rave reviews on this little gem, I had to get my paws on it and boy oh boy was I pleased. I usually like to give a product a while before I declare my undying love, but this one had me at hello.

I noticed a difference in the texture of my lips after the first application. It has a thick consistency, which might not be to everyones liking, but personally this is a huge plus, it really makes me feel like my lips are being thoroughly nourished. It takes a little while to sink into the lips but that too is A ok with me. It has a combination of honey and precious oils (according to the website) which really work deep down to restore chapped, dry lips. It also has a delicious citrus flavour, which is down to the grapefruit essence. I’m a little bit of a lip balm fiend and I have to say when it comes to lip balm I’ve definitely had a fair share in my time. This by far is my all time favourite and something I will continue to use for a very very long time. My lips look not only plumped and kissable but there’s not a bit of flakey skin in sight.

So for this Beauty Bite I’m awarding the Nuxe Reve De Miel Lip Balm a life changing 5 out of 5. You are pretty awesome my friend, and don’t you ever change!

Thanks so much for reading,

Stay Cool,

Bailey xox

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Beauty

Two Sponges, That Changed My Life

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Ok so the title of this post is a little dramatic, but ask anyone and that’s me, dramatic. Anyway, I wanted to dedicate a post to these two sponges, both with different jobs in my life, but both equally as important.

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The first is this teardrop shaped sponge, that if you are a true beauty addict you will recognise right away. No its not the original Beauty Blender, but a $5 dupe, that I found whilst browsing the aisles of my local Kmart. I treated myself to the original BB about 4 years ago, when it was relatively new on the scene. In fact I made a whole youtube video dedicated to it. Somewhere along the way it got lost in this huge Bermuda Triangle; that I’m sure my bobby pins and hair ties end up in. Anyway, I digress, naturally over the years since I lost my BB I did contemplate purchasing another but the price tag always stopped me. But then on a sunny Saturday afternoon, this Beauty stepped into my life. If you’re unfamiliar with the BB, it’s a sponge that you pop under running water until it expands and doubles in size, you then wring it out, place your foundation or concealer on your face and then stipple (dab) the sponge over your face. You’re left with a beautiful, natural skin like finish. The other benefits of these sponges is that they use far less product, as the sponge is wet it doesn’t absorb the foundation like a brush or latex sponge would. This dupe is pretty amazing. It performs just like the original in my opinion. I’ve had it for over a month and its still holding up well. The only downside is that it’s a little harder to clean, than the original. I’ve been using a baby shampoo and it’s doing the job ok, but there’s still a little product left on the sponge after each wash. This though is something I’m willing to overlook as it’s an absolute steal at $5.

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The next sponge is on a whole different spectrum. I’m probably really late to the party with this one but its the Konjac sponge. It’s a Japanese face and body cleansing sponge that’s made from vegetable fibres of the Konjac. I believe it was originally used in Japan as a sponge for bathing babies, because if its soft texture. I, on the other hand have been incorporating this sponge into my daily skincare routine. Basically all you do is place the sponge under running water until it expands in size, add a tiny amount of your preferred cleanser and get to scrucbbing, once you’re satisfied with your scrub just hang it up by the white string and let it dry for the next use.  The sponge has an alkaline property so, it works really well at neutralising any problem areas, like enlarged pores, blackheads and acne. It’s also gentle exfoliator, and I’ve noticed the little white heads on my forehead are slowly disappearing. The other plus side to this is that I’ve been using far far less of my cleanser, which is perfect for me as I’m in love with a cleanser which like most things is really hard to get my hands on in NZ. As you can see I have the plain white original one, but there are loads of different sponges for different skin types, which is pretty cool. The only downside is that the sponge isn’t for life. As it is made from vegetable fibre it does come with an expiry, which I believe is about 3 months. However they are pretty cheap. I just googled Konjac Sponge and found a local seller, but I know they are widely available on Amazon or Ebay.

So there you have it, two editions to my beauty regime, that I am pretty darn chuffed with.

Thanks for reading

Stay Cool,

Bailey xox

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Recipe

Frozen Banana & Peanut Bites

So, I’m feeling a little like I am always starting my posts with an apology. I’ll get it over with really quickly. The blog has been put on the back burner the last month/few weeks. Things have been chaotic in this house hold, I won’t go into it, but it’s all very exciting, but very stressful. Anyhow I’m back today with a super easy peasy recipe, if you can really call it that. I’ve seen this idea on Pintrest and Youtube, so thought I’d give it a whack. So, without further waffle lets get started…

What You’ll Need:

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* 1 Ripe Banana

*Dark Chocolate

*Nuts of Your Choice (optional)

*Nut Butter of Your Choice (I’m using Pic Peanut Butter But Almond would work great too)

*Baking Paper

Method:

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1. Melt your dark chocolate in the microwave in 30 second increments, alternatively you can do this using a double boil method on the stove top.

2. Whilst the chocolate is melting, chop your banana into small slices

3. Place a dollop of your nut butter of choice on top of the banana. If you’d prefer, you can leave this step out.

4.Place a slice of the banana on top to make a little sandwich.

5. This is where it gets a little messy. Place a sheet of baking paper on a tray or plate and put your banana sandwiches on top. Pour your dark chocolate onto the banana, so that they are covered evenly.

6.Add the topping of your choice, this is also optional. I decided to put some chopped walnuts on mine, but you could also use almonds, sprinkles or coconut flakes, the skies the limit with these.

7. Finally place in the freezer for at least 1 hour.

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You’re left with these gorgeous little bites. When the banana freezes it take on a ice cream like consistency and creaminess. If you close your eyes you pretend that this sweet treat is a lot more naughty than it really is. I feel a little bad making this into a recipe as it is incredibly easy, but they are so yummy I couldn’t keep these to myself.

Thanks so much for reading.

Stay Cool,

Bailey xox

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YouTube Challenge

Day 3 Youtube Exercise Challenge

Today brought a well deserved day off from work. It was also a day of big grown up decisions, therefore I felt the need to channel my inner Queen B diva and do a little booty shaking for Day 3 of this Youtube Challenge. I even slapped in a hair mask, for extra diva style. You can check out days 1 and 2 if you like.

What You’ll Need:

Just you and your bootay, oh and maybe an empty house if you get a little shy like moi.

Skill Level: Beginner/Intermediate

Sweat Rating:4out of 5

Fun Rating: 4 out of 5

Quick Fit Summary:

This routine is pretty SEXY. If you’re a little shy like I am, I would probably save this one for when you’re home alone, as I had my wonderful boyfriend come home mid butt wiggle. It’s relatively easy to follow along with and the instructor is such a babe. Although I would hate to see what I actually looked like, because in my head I’m killing it like Beyonce. It definitely gets the heart rate up, and I would maybe recommend this for a day when you’re feeling like something a little less intense. The only downside is the video is only 10 minutes long so, I just repeated it twice and I found that by the second time I was obviously a bit more co-ordinated. Pop Sugar is a really amazing channel that does lots of different types of workouts with varying  levels and styles, so I’m pretty sure they will be popping up again in the challenge.

Enjoy your Friday everyone!

Stay cool,

Bailey xox

*Disclaimer; I am by no means a fitness guru or expert far from it actually. SO, please do always seek out medical/professional advice before attempting any of these videos, if you have any concerns or injuries.

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